When it comes to building financial wealth, emotions and money often seem to be at odds with one another. Yet, as human beings, our emotions are our primary source of abundance as they allow us to connect to other human beings and forge truly prosperous alliances, partnerships, and relationships. Surprising research shows that loving relationships are strongly correlated with a person’s ability to grow wealth. In fact, successful relationships appear to be almost a pre-requisite for success with money.
A 79-year old Harvard study concluded that warm, loving relationships may be the primary determinant when it comes to happiness, health, longevity, and wealth. Known originally as the Grant Study, researchers began tracking 268 Harvard sophomores from the classes of 1939-1944.
The research showed a strong link between loving relationships and financial success.
Whether the relationship is with a parent, a spouse, grandparents, children or friends, people who love well tend to build more wealth. Check out some other impressive findings from the study:
Brotherly love: Men with one or more close relationships with a sibling made $51,000 more per year than men who had poor relationships with their siblings, or no siblings at all.
Stable homes: Men who grew up in cohesive homes took home $66,000 more per year than men from unstable homes.
Caring mothers: Men whose mothers were warm earned $87,000 more than men whose mothers were uncaring. The men’s boyhood relationships with their mothers (but not with their fathers) were also associated with effectiveness at work.
Home run relationships: The 58 men with the best scores for warm relationships made almost $150,000 more per year than the 31 men with the worst scores!
Unhappy childhood? Men who were not close with their parents or siblings in their youth could overcome that handicap by developing warm relationships (successful marriage, friendships) in mid-life. By doing this, they could rise to the top in happiness and success in their latter years.
While these findings are based on research conducted solely on men (due to the laws that were in place at the start of the study that dictated that only men could attend college), results of the study can serve as great insight for women as well.
One of the most prominent conclusions from the Grant Study was this: “It was the capacity for intimate relationships that predicted flourishing in all aspects of these men’s lives.” To the surprise of the researchers- warm, caring relationships counted for more than factors such as intelligence IQ, friendliness, body type, athletic prowess, or the economic standing and education of one’s parents. Meaning that the quality of your support system has the power to dictate your level of abundance and wellbeing overriding factors such as rich parents, great physical appearance, degrees, etc .
All statistics aside, it's not too difficult to see that our relationships have the power to make or break all areas of our lives, including our pocketbooks. Motivational speaker Jim Rohn famously said that we are the average of the five people we spend the most time with. When it comes to relationships, we are greatly influenced — whether we like it or not — by those closest to us. It affects our way of thinking, our self-esteem, and our decisions.
Being closely surrounded by positive, supportive people who want you to succeed is critical to your success in life and in money.
While it's tempting to put your relationships on pause while hustling after that money bag, the irony is that more often than not, it's your relationships and interpersonal connections that can support you in accelerating your growth and prosperity. So, don't hesitate to show that love! You're bound to feel its positive effects in your heart space and in your pocketbook.
As someone who has been through the wringer when it comes to past relationships, I can confidently say that opening and re-opening our hearts to people can be one of the toughest things to do. But what's the alternative? Living life carrying a heavy heart full of resentment and anger? Sounds like a miserable (and broke) existence if you ask me. Wise ol' Buddha said it himself:
"Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die."
While there are a certain set of behaviors that I personally consider 'unforgivable', there are many other trespasses that we have to learn to just let go of or else they will poison our souls and ultimately, our entire existence (bank account included).
When you block your heart off from feeling emotions or connecting with others, what you're really doing is creating a block in the flow of abundance in all areas of your life that eventually manifests itself as lack. Lack of money, lack of health, lack of progress, lack of wellbeing, lack, lack, lack!
Everything in the natural world, including human beings, exists in a state of flow (think of the seasons! The Winter turns into Spring, then Summer turns into Fall then flows to Winter again). The quicker you learn to tap into your emotions (letting them flow in as they come, processing them, transmuting them, and letting them flow out more productively), the quicker you can get on to making that money alongside people who have also learned how to channel their emotions towards growth and prosperity.
How do you think some of the most successful people got to where they're at? By using the humanness of their emotions to cultivate mutually supportive relationships in life, love, and business. Your emotions are the source of your infinite abundance both in the spiritual and the material world.
So, the next time you hesitate to let those feelings flow, just know that holding back can cause your bank account to suffer as well. Don't be scuuuured of your emotions. You're going to need them if you ever hope to achieve truly meaningful and enduring relationships.
But what is the secret ingredient to having successful relationships? YOU!
Do the work to become your healthiest Self in mind, body + spirit so you can be an asset to your own and other people's lives. This requires self-awareness, self-reflection, and, in many cases, outside professional help to mitigate and minimize destructive character flaws. Don't be afraid to dig deep to discover your strengths + weaknesses, morals + values, and your virtues + vices so you can ultimately cultivate more productive relationships and a more productive life.
The journey back to your authentic self is a life-long journey. Be gentle with yourself and with others. We're all a work in progress! Above all, never stop investing in yourself and investing in those who invest in YOU. Your life and your pocketbook will thank you for it.
Here is to your new start in life and in finances! Stay fabulous, fierce + financially savvy bellas.
Nothing great was ever accomplished alone so be patient with yourself as you call in the people, places + things that can support you in getting to that next level in your life and in your finances. Stop by Latina Money's Dinero School to meet the Dinero Team. Click the image below to check out our masterclasses.
Dinero School™ by Latina Money was created to meet the profound need for accessible, affordable, and culturally-relevant financial education ✊🏻✊🏼✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿 By investing in the economic empowerment of communities of color, we can accelerate the momentum towards equality, poverty eradication and inclusive economic growth. See you in class beauties!